"The most aggravating thing about the younger generation is that I no longer belong to it. " ~~ Albert Einstein
"When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them." ~~ Rodney Dangerfield
"Vote for the man who promises the least; he”ll be the least disappointing. " ~~ Bernard Baruch
"Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering – and it’s all over much too soon. " ~~ Woody Allen
"She got her looks from her father. He’s a plastic surgeon. " ~~ Groucho Marx
"Most often, the man who becomes leader is not the one that knows the way but the one who behaves as if he does. " ~~ Shim’oni
"Capital punishment would be more effective as a preventive measure if it were administered prior to the crime. " ~~ Woody Allen
"Life is just a bowl of pits. " ~~ Rodney Dangerfield
"Nature is by and large to be found out of doors, a location where, it cannot be argued, there are never enough comfortable chairs. " ~~ Fran Lebowitz
"I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking. " ~~ Joan Rivers
"The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible. " ~~ George Burns
"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. " ~~ Albert Einstein
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