"I take my wife everywhere I go. She always finds her way back." ~~ Henny Youngman
"How to drive a guy crazy: send him a telegram and on the top put ‘page 2.’" ~~ Henny Youngman
"I’ve got all the money I’ll ever need, if I die by four o clock. " ~~ Henny Youngman
"You can’t buy love, but you can pay heavily for it." ~~ Henny Youngman
"When God sneezed, I didn’t know what to say." ~~ Henny Youngman