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"Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not the color, but to accept God’s final decision on where your lips end." ~~ Jerry Seinfeld

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"Men don’t care what’s on TV. They only care what else is on TV." ~~ Jerry Seinfeld

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"The whole object of comedy is to be yourself and the closer you get to that, the funnier you will be." ~~ Jerry Seinfeld

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"To me, if life boils down to one thing, it’s movement. To live is to keep moving. " ~~ Jerry Seinfeld

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"It’s amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. " ~~ Jerry Seinfeld

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