"Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not the color, but to accept God’s final decision on where your lips end." ~~ Jerry Seinfeld
"Men don’t care what’s on TV. They only care what else is on TV." ~~ Jerry Seinfeld
"The whole object of comedy is to be yourself and the closer you get to that, the funnier you will be." ~~ Jerry Seinfeld
"To me, if life boils down to one thing, it’s movement. To live is to keep moving. " ~~ Jerry Seinfeld
"It’s amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper. " ~~ Jerry Seinfeld